How to Handle Stress and Anxiety During the Holidays

By: Shannon Sweeney

The holidays are meant to be a joyous time spent celebrating with loved ones, but some unwelcome guests may manage to sneak their way in — stress and anxiety. While you’re trying to relax and enjoy the holidays, these two unwelcome guests can wreak havoc on your physical and mental health, making you eager for the holidays to end instead of actually being merry and bright.

The bottom line? Holidays and mental health don’t go together like two turtle doves. 

Between the whirlwind of planning dinners, shopping, dealing with difficult family members, and just feeling generally overwhelmed, it’s no wonder that stress and anxiety affect so many people during the holiday season. So first, it’s important to understand that you are not alone in how you feel, and luckily, there are some tips on how to handle stress during the holidays.

Let’s talk a little about what causes holiday stress, the signs and symptoms of it, and of course, how to cope with the seemingly unavoidable stress of the holiday season.

Holiday Stress Facts And Figures

According to a survey from Think Finance, 45% of Americans would prefer to skip Christmas altogether, primarily because of money-related stress. Financial stress plays a huge role in holiday planning, and is often the source of a lot of anxiety during the holidays, especially if you’re already on a tight budget. 

The statistics don’t stop with financial stress — a poll from the American Psychological Association showed that nearly a quarter of Americans feel “extreme stress” around the holidays. Here’s how their stress breaks down: 

• 69% of people are stressed during the holidays from “lack of time” 

• 69% of people are stressed by perceiving a “lack of money” 

• 51% of people are stressed out about “the pressure to give or get gifts” 

If you find yourself feeling stressed for the same reasons, you’re not the only one. But it’s still important to pay attention to the signs that you’re starting to get overwhelmed.

Signs and Symptoms of Holiday Stress

There’s a lot of pressure that comes with the holiday season — like attending social gatherings, rituals, family traditions, and more. It affects everyone, even children. Holiday stress can be caused by any number of situations, including: 

• Shopping and financial stress (pressure to buy gifts) 

• Cleaning and cooking for/entertaining guests

• Family gatherings or family issues

• Travel-induced stress

• Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), also called seasonal depression

• Attending parties or being in large crowds

Any of these circumstances can put you in a situation where you feel increased stress and anxiety. You may notice symptoms such as: 

• Feelings of general anxiety 

• Sadness and mood swings

• Irritability 

• Lack of sleep

• Headaches

• Body aches

• Shortness of breath

If you find yourself experiencing any of these symptoms it’s fairly common. Fortunately there strategies you can use to help prepare for increased stress and to alleviate some of the anxiety.

Tips to Reduce Holiday Stress

With a busy holiday calendar it may be difficult to find time for self-care and proactive preparation. But in many cases, your best defense is a strong offense. If you’re beginning to feel overwhelmed, try some of these techniques.

1. Plan ahead. Set aside specific days for shopping, cleaning, attending parties, and more. If you’re cooking or hosting, plan what you’re making ahead of time and plan your grocery shopping accordingly. The more you can get done earlier, the less overwhelmed you will feel last minute. You’ll also be able to plan with friends or family members on what responsibilities are — who’s bringing what, who’s hosting, and what you need to do. 

2. Keep your finances in check. Make a gift budget and stick to it — you don’t need to spend a lot of money on every person in your family or friend group. Instead, try homemade presents, think about projects that can result in large batches like homemade sugar scrubs, bath bombs, lotions, flavored salts, and oils or really any homemade baked goods. You can also get ahead of budget-busting buying sprees by planning a limited gift exchange with your friends and family. When it comes to meal planning, plan your menu early to better anticipate how much you’ll need to spend and incorporate food costs into your overall holiday budget. Make sure to pay attention to the grocery store and mall deals, too, for extra savings! 

3. Take time for yourself and say no more. You don’t have to attend every holiday-related event you’re invited to. It’s OK to say no to a few Christmas parties or other social gatherings — your friends, family, and colleagues will understand. Make sure to take time for yourself and to do things you enjoy during the holiday season. Whether that’s going to the gym, staying home and watching a movie, reading, or something different, do something for you. This will also help you stick to your normal routine, which can also help alleviate stress.

4. Plan for how to deal with family. Complex family dynamics are no doubt a huge part of holiday stress. Do you dread family gatherings? Here’s what to do. Sit down and evaluate your family’s problems — if they are abusive, unpleasant, or unhealthy for you to be around, consider making other holiday plans. Remember: the holidays aren’t just about making other people happy, your needs matter too. If your family is just generally irritating, take time to practice coping mechanisms, communication skills and exit strategies. Pick your battles, and avoid bringing up topics that may cause issues (cough, politics, cough). If you find yourself getting irritated, get up and go to another room for a few minutes to be by yourself and reset. 

5. Get rest! This ties closely with taking time for yourself. Make sure you’re actually resting and relaxing during the holidays! It’s extremely important to get an adequate amount of sleep, and if you find yourself having trouble sleeping (a symptom of anxiety), consider meditation apps, reading before bed, or another activity that will naturally make you feel sleepier. Another tip: Don’t look at your phone while you’re laying in bed — the nasty blue light will keep your brain churning when it should be slowing down for the night.

6. Ask for help. There is absolutely no shame in seeking professional help for anxiety and stress — every person in this world can benefit from seeing a therapist. If you feel like you’re losing control and can’t escape the feeling of stress or anxiety, consider making an appointment, even if it’s just a few times during the holiday season. You might find that it’s helpful for all aspects of your life and that you could benefit all year round. The only way to find out is to make the call! 

For a lot of us, the joy of the holidays starts to dissipate as we get older. When we stop being the children whose only job is to delight in the magic of the season and become the ones responsible for making the magic, it’s easy to get swept up in the costs, obligations, and to-do lists. But the holidays should be fun for all of us, so if you find your sense of wonder is wiped out by dread and apprehension, take a step back and breathe. Take care of yourself. If you’re miserable, no matter how much food you make or the money you spend, a lot of the cheer will be lost not just for you, but also for the people who love you and only want you to be happy.

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